New State, New Start

 

   So it is time to fill everyone in.... I am definitely moving back to Florida! I have put a lot of thought into it and am finally extremely happy with my decision to start over. Starting over sounds crazy but that is exactly what I am counting on! I am packing everything up and in 4 short days Sophie and myself will be starting out 14 hour drive to Melbourne, FL!

 

  Now don't get me wrong... there are a few very important people in my life that I am going to miss terribly and have to come back and visit as frequently as possible but it is a two way street and they will have to come visit me as well! But if you read this blog, you should know that once I get down there I am going to change my Phone Number so that I can completely put the past 3 years behind me! I really am looking forward to starting from scratch and I know that it will be hard and I am going to struggle at first, especially trying to find a place to live. Living with my parents is a great money saving but I NEED MY OWN SPACE! I would rather work 3 jobs and come home to my own little get a way than feel like I am still the rebellious teenager I was 10 years ago! Its time to grow up lock it down and be completely independent and I am so looking forward to it!

 

The next post will be as a Floridan out of my new home and the start of a new chapter in my crazy messed up book of Life :)

 

 



Moving towards the Future

"Never Give Up on Something that

you Can't go a DAY without thinking about"

-Unkown

For so long, it has always been about what I should do, what would make everyone around me proud, how to get ahead in life, how to survive in the world as an adult... worry, Worry, WORRY! Well I am putting my foot down!

For the past 2 months, I have been trying to put together a battle plan to move forward with everything and I have come to TWO options...so opinions are greatly appreciated!

 and/or

Option 1 - I can move back to Florida and hope that I can get back into Ultrasound down there since thats where all my contacts are and plus all my classmates. Down there I know for a fact that I can get some scanning time in and pursue my love of doing OB Ultrasounds. :) And if I cant do it right away I can apply to the Radiology Programs down there and hope that I get into the imaging field as soon as possible.  Downside.... Id have to quit an amazing paying job up here and leave my friends again just when I think things might be turning around for me.

Option 2 - I can stay up here and apply to the Radiology and Ultrasound programs and see which one I get into but Continue to work where I am and make the money I am making. I would be near everyone that I need support from (except my Florida Ultrasound people that I love so very much) and could still attempt to follow my career dreams and make monthly trips to Florida for the time being. Plus I would get to continue to go to my Awesome Trainer that I have been for 18 months and get to my goal weight! I am almost there! 20 lbs to go!

Either way - I know that I want to work in imaging and I am DETERMINED TO GET THERE! Even if that means that I have to do the Program all over again! (At Least I know I will pass it!)

New Year - New Start!

It has taken me the first week of January to figure out my plans and my resolutions for the year but I think I have finally figured out a plan to do!
However before I get into my plans and Resolutions - let me fill you in on my LIFE!
  Since Christmas, I have been working a ton to try and get a head start on my bills (not really working - way to many). I have decided to cut as much stress out of my life and possible and that has included people that are my "friends", jobs and other personal issue. This year is a brand new one! One where I will be turning 25 years old and I will be putting the childish dreams and actions behind me. I am focusing on me now and nobody else. Now if someone comes along, stranger or someone I have known my whole life and sweeps me off my feet, wonderful! If not, oh well, one day he will come and realize that I am a great person - just takes a little longer for some people for figure it out :) I have withdrew from Massage Therapy school so that I can focus on my full time job. I may not love it but I do love money and want to buy my own house one day! My dad was right, I will never find another job that pays me as much as I currently get paid at 24 years old with full benefits and a 401k plan. Maybe after all my debts are paid off and I am able to save some money, I will consider going back to school but until then its time to step up to the plate of being an adult!
  As for my New Years Resolutions... this is my plan! I am going to go to the gym more than just to meet my trainer twice a week! I want to feel great about my self and going by myself is definitely going to be a struggle but it will totally be worth it :) I want to continue to change my eating habits and start eating but healthier than I have been. So far, so good but I still love my pizza every now and again! Pasta will be the death of me but its just soooo good! I am definitely on a cooking binge lately which is awesome! I love cooking.
 I had to seperate resolutions to Goals because lets be honest... they are not the same thing! My goals for 2013 are more of a personal motivational goal.
 First, I only have 2 Goals that I wish to carry out all year long and that is to Read at least 1 book every month and pay off as much of my debt as I possibly can to start saving money to buy my first house!
 Second, every month I have chosen to give up one thing that I love....
        January: Chocolate
        February: Shopping
        March: Soda
        April: Buying Movies
        May: Buying sunglasses for myself
        June: Coffee
        July: Bread
        August: Candy
        September: Facebook
        October: Buying Music
        November: Beer
        December: Fried Foods 

 

I will be making a dream board tonight, so I will be sure to post it on here as soon as I am done!

Holidays and family...

So it's almost Christmas time and I have been doing really good! I'm trying this new eat healthy thing which is really exciting for me because I actually enjoy it and I feel better throughout the day. I'm not so sluggish anymore! Although I still need like 12 hours of sleep a night which I'm lucky if I get 5 hours :(

I've learned that it's extremely hard to live at home with my fried food loving parents and keep a healthy diet. They love fatty foods and they love eating out. I really just want to start making protein shakes in the mornings for breakfast but I need some ideas. I'm going to get tired of banana and peanut butter all the time! So if you read this and have some good ideas, let me know!

I'm starting to close of this year in my life and the next few weeks will be hectic and crazy but I am quite determined to start 2013 with a fresh blank slate and focus on my life and my future. Many changes to come and hopefully this time next year, ill be talking about buying my first house and maybe even being in a steady healthy relationship! HAHA We will just have to wait and see what a new year hold for me ;-)

It's time for new goals and a new life plan! I accomplished ALL of my goals in 2012 with a few extras (both good and bad) along the way! My plan is to figure out plan my goals for next year (since the world isn't ending in 3 days) in the next week and my last post of 2012 will be my weight and self focused goals for the new year! Along with a resolution or 2 :)

STAY TUNED....

The start of something new...

“All human actions have one or more of these seven causes: chance, nature, compulsion, habit, reason, passion, and desire.”
― Aristotle, Selected Works

In the past year, I have tried to accomplish several things but something always seems to get in the way. Today, on my first day back to work since my tiny little Thanksgiving getaway, I came across this quote from Aristotle and it really touched me where I needed to be for a long while.
   Chance was me meeting all the people that have come into my life when I needed them.Being only for a few months or forever. These people have changed my life and help make me the person I am today, with the strength, I never knew I had in me!
   Nature was in full swing in July-September of this year. It was nature that put me on a course of discovery. Something that I didn't think would happen for a very long time, happened and it was AMAZING for the short amount of time and then once again nature came through and decided a different course for me. At the time, I though what did I do to deserve this?! But less than a few weeks later, that answer was very clear. I know understand and truely believe the quote "Everything happens for a reason." I celebrated, regreted, denied, accepted, grew and learned from that brief period of time and because Stronger!
   Compulsion is something that definitely keeps you on your toes. Be it, complusion buys (like I love to do), compulsive choices in relationship- which I also tend to do. Oh to love quickly and hurt forever. Complusion can be a good thing or a bad thing and for me, it has been both. Without the bad what would you have to look forward to if every choice you made was good and the right one.
   Habit is the way I always want to help people, even if I know this is going to hurt me in the end. I have a strong habit of putting myself in situations that are boardering on fairtale or disaster and 99.9% disaster prevails, but it never stops me. Like they say... old habits die hard :)
   Reason is everything I do!. It is never for myself, underneath it all, every choice I make I do for somebody. Whether it be for myself or someone else that I care about deeply, I always have a reaon for doing the most out of this world brainiac things and I love almost every minute of it.
   Passion is the center of everything. Without passion, what are you doing anything for? My life would be very boring if I wasn't passionate about helping my friends and going to school. Without passion, I would never live. Oh my gosh, I'd be a couch potato or worse...a moocher! I have passion to work and make something of myself so that one day I can provide for my family the way my parents have provided for my sister and I. In my opinion, Passion keeps your heart beating in a way that when you do get those butterflies in your stomach and a twinkle in your eye, Everything seems worth it!
   Desire is to reward yourself. If you desire something, won't you do anything you can to get it? Desire for me is my dreams, my fairytale ending. I don't care how many people come and go in my life, I only need the people that matter so the desire I have for Prince Charming has to eventually come true. Every girls vision of Prince Charming is different...for me he is the man that makes everything else move in slow motion. The man that doesn't make me the center of his world but make the world our playground with us standing in the middle, holding hands with no intention of ever letting go. That is desire!
                      
                                   August 2011                                  June 2012
I have started this blog to keep track of everything I wish to accomplish from here on out. Many of you may not know this but in October of 2011 I weighed almost 200 lbs and was depressed and disgusted in myself. I started working out with a trainer, Jonathan, at Anytime Fitness in Perry Hall and it truely changed my life, he changed my life, he saved my life! Since then I have lost 32 pounds and am still counting. I am still training with him and loving every minute of it! Now that 2012 is coming to a close, I want to make another change (aside from cutting my hair off and donating it which was a huge deal for me). Last year my change was my weight. This coming year, I want to change my lifestyle! I am happy with the weight-loss but I am still struggling with being comfortable with my body. Starting December 1, 2012 I will be changing my eating style for the first time ever! This is going to be very hard for me since I live at home and my parents like all the foods that I need to avoid. Every month I am going to make a new goal and hope that with that it will keep me blogging and keeping track of everything. It is time for me to be proud of myself and be happy to look in the mirror. To recognize the person looking back at me for the first time in 5 years. All I ask of you is to follow me in my journey and give me encouragment. I do everything I can but sometime the down is really down. Support me and be positive, give me any helpful recipies or excercises!